Stephen Whitehead
Dr Stephen M. Whitehead is a distinguished sociologist, feminist, educationalist and writer. He is internationally recognised for his expertise in gender studies, particularly focusing on men and masculinities, gender identity, and international education. Over his prolific career he has authored or co-authored 20 books and numerous academic articles and book chapters. His work spans topics such as gender theory, identity, globalisation, education and organisational studies.
Stephen is a prominent figure in the study of men, masculinities and gender identity. His influential works include Men and Masculinities (2001), The Masculinities Reader (2002) and Toxic Masculinity: Curing the Virus (2020). He is co-creator of the pro-feminist concept of Toxic Femininity (The Myths of Toxic Femininity, 2025), and was the first sociologist to identify and define toxic masculinity (2014). He is creator of the “Total Inclusivity” concept and its application in various domains such as workplaces (Total Inclusivity at Work, 2022); schools (Becoming a Totally Inclusive School, 2022), and universities (Creating a Totally Inclusive University, 2022). Recent books, Self-Love for Women (2024), and Design Your Self: 21 Life Lessons (2025), explore themes of self-empowerment.
Stephen’s 20th book, The End of Sex: The Gender Revolution and its Consequences (published September, 2025), has been described as “A thought-provoking and ambitious work that captures the global scale and urgency of the gender divergence we are seeing today. The themes of rising independent femininity, the crisis of traditional masculinity, and the impact of technology on relationships are all extremely timely, and in many ways, unsettling.”
Stephen’s research employs qualitative methods to explore identity formation. His writing style bridges academic rigor with accessibility for mainstream audiences. His books have been translated into 17 languages and received global media attention.
Other notable publications include:
- International Schooling: The Teacher’s Guide (2020)
- Gender and Identity (2014)
- The Many Faces of Men (2004)
- My Dark Side (2012)
- Managing Professional Identities (2002)
Pub Landlord to Academic
Stephen was born and raised in Southport, Merseyside, though his family originated from Greenhow Hill, North Yorkshire. He moved to Leeds in 1975 to manage pubs and restaurants for Tetley’s Brewery, becoming landlord of The Jubilee (The Headrow) and then, the Woodside Tavern (Horsforth). In 1987, Stephen began his career in education, first as a lecturer at Thomas Danby FE College, Leeds, and, in 1996, as Lecturer in Business Studies at Leeds University. He earned his PhD (1997) from Leeds Metropolitan University, focusing on men, masculinities, and education management. He became Senior Lecture in Education at Keele University (1997-2009) where he also served as Programme Director for various educational programmes. He later became International Programme Coordinator at Keele University (2009-2015), based in Thailand, overseeing programmes for international educators. Stephen then applied this expertise to build a successful international school consultancy in South East Asia. Stephen now lives in Hat Yai, Thailand, with his wife, Mam.
My decade at Thomas Danby was one of the most important in my life: I studied for a PGCE (Huddersfield Poly), an MA, and finally, a PhD (both at Leeds Met. University) graduating from the latter with Distinction (no edits) in December 1996. During this frantic and often intense decade I also experienced several relationship changes and had three more children (Jay, Robert and Eleanor). This hectic personal journey continued through my 50s and into my early 60s eventually settling down with my wife, Mam, in Thailand.
I first came to Thailand in 2001 and moved here permanently in 2008 at the age of 59. Up until early 2025 I lived in Chiang Mai, with my wife Mam and our daughter, Dia. We then moved to the far south; Hat Yai, Songkhla province. It’s quiet, very few tourists, and close to great beaches. A gem of a place. My other favourite spots in South East Asia, aside from Chiang Mai, are Bangkok, Taipei and Hanoi.
My good friend and co-author of ‘International Schooling’, Dr Denry Machin, and I enjoying afternoon tea at the Anantara Siam Hotel, Bangkok, May, 2023.
The Professional
I have been a florist, guitarist/drummer, pub/restaurant manager, athletics coach, amateur (but competitive!) road runner, life/relationship coach, school teacher, FE lecturer, HE lecturer/professor, writer, educational management consultant, company director, and even, for a brief spell back in my mid-30s, a local politician. But don’t worry, I’m not going to bore you with all the details of my many career changes and professional identity transformations, I’ll just give you a potted summary since the age of 47.
After graduating from my PhD in December 1996, aged 47, I lectured part-time in various UK universities including Leeds University Business School, before being appointed full-time Lecturer in Education at Keele University, UK in September 1997. My doctoral thesis was titled
Public and Private Men: Masculinities in Further Education Management (still available in Leeds Met Univ. library, I am told). By the completion of this thesis I was a fully-fledged feminist; in academic terms, a feminist poststructuralist (with leanings towards feminist postmodernism). My PhD research provided the basis for many of my subsequent writings and publications, including my first major academic book: Men and Masculinities: key themes and new directions (Polity, 2002).
So, in essence, I was a sociologist, a specialist in the critical study of men and masculinities (still am). However, back in the late 90s there were no jobs available lecturing on men and masculinities, so when Keele offered me the job of Lecturer in Education, I jumped at it. By the time I took early retirement from Keele University in March 2009, I had been promoted to Senior Lecturer; had over two dozen academic journal articles/book chapters published; had seven books published (academic and mainstream, one of which received world-wide publicity and was translated into 15 languages); was Director of Keele’s MBA Education programme and co-Director of Keele’s EdD programme; and had acquired an international reputation as an expert on men and masculinities and gender identity.
Moving to Thailand didn’t stop my career progression nor slow down my writing. My 14th, 15th and 16th books are all schedule to be published by Routledge during 2022.
My most significant professional events (excluding book publications) since March 2009 (e.g. ‘retirement’) were as follows:
Moving to Thailand didn’t stop my career progression nor slow down my writing. My 14th, 15th and 16th books are all schedule to be published by Routledge during 2022.
My most significant professional events (excluding book publications) since March 2009 (e.g. ‘retirement’) were as follows:
What’s next?
Not sure – I have enough going on plus I must retain time for my daily exercises (walking, weights and cycling), meditation, sleep, and enjoyment of my garden.
The Practice
There is a lot I can say about life, living it, and surviving if not flourishing, but I won’t. I’ll keep it short. If you want to know more read my books, book me to do professional development/Total inclusivity Training at your school or organisation, or simply read some of my 10,500 Quora answers to questions ranging from sex, love and relationships, to career progression for retirees. Either that, or send me an email.
What I will say is that life is most definitely more than about work, material accumulation, contented relationships or a satisfying sex life. All these are important at different times in our life journey, but as a 70+ male I can tell you that none of these will trump loving oneself and being contented in one’s identity.
As for identity, we are all work in progress. We are all constantly changing and in ways we cannot begin to understand or appreciate until well after the event. Who you are today is not who you will be tomorrow and certainly not who you will be in a decade’s time. What you desire and yearn for today will disappear from your mind in time. Everything passes, including sexual desire, material desire, love desire, status desire. You will eventually reach your old age reduced to the core of you. Hopefully, that core will be good, kind, wholesome, healthy and empathetic. If not, then you will pass on carrying a lot of unpleasant baggage.
Try and avoid that if you can.
I think I have avoided all that negativity (recrimination, bitterness, disappointment, regret, guilt) but if so it is largely because of those I’ve had around me during my own life journey; friends, partners, family, children, work colleagues, mentors, teachers, students and soulmates. And also because of Buddhism. Well, not just Buddhism but a complex if unfathomable spiritual mix of Buddhism, Hinduism and Animism. If you want to learn more about how these apparently contradictory spiritual discourses intact, just visit most any temple (Wat) in northern Thailand.
For my own life, I now enjoy being teetotal, celibate and free from worry about money, status or tomorrow. The sex monkey thankfully disappeared off my shoulder a few years ago and he’s not coming back. Corny as it may sound, I now get more pleasure watching a butterfly hovering on a flower, listening to a bird singing in the trees, or seeing the sun rising in the East.
Buddhism
how it has changed me.
- I have learnt to go with the flow of life and events.
- I don’t try to change that which cannot be changed.
- I have learnt that my first reaction is not always the best one.
- I am more relaxed and at peace with myself.
- I am able to pray for the well-being of others and pass on good karma, positive energy by doing so.
- I have learnt to be comfortable with who I have become.
- I have learnt that to forgive all things and all people everything is the only way to peace.
- I have learnt that it is important not to let anger and frustration overwhelm me.
- I have learnt that I must try to do good wherever possible.
- I listen to my body more, and to my inner voice.
- I make plans but do not worry when they come to nothing.
- I am more likely to accept what happens to me and around me.
- I recognise that life is ultimately going to be painful at times. There is no avoiding pain and suffering only accepting it as the true reality for most people.
- I do not worry about that which is beyond my control.
- I am happier and more content.
- I have developed my sixth sense more and learnt to follow it
- I am not absorbed by the acquisition of money or material things.
- I recognise my desires and have learnt to live with them.
- I know I cannot live as a monk but I do know I can live a more spiritual life.
- I know that peace on earth can only come from peace within each human being Peace cannot be imposed on us by politicians or ideologies.
- I have come to understand God not as a being but as the life force, the positive energy that enables the world into existence and maintains its balance and harmony.
- I have learnt the if we as a society or as an individual break or damage that harmony through negative actions then so will negative consequences come back to us – this is the basic law of karma – you reap what you sow.
- I have learnt not to fear death.
- I have learnt not to pontificate about Buddhism but to live it daily.
- I have learnt to know when I am angry and frustrated and to allow that anger and frustration to dissipate – leave me.
- I have learnt that only with a quiet mind can I truly be awake.
- I have learnt that most of us do not have a quiet mind – or any inner peace.
- I have learnt that without inner peace we cannot be awake to the life itself.
- I have learnt that the more I attach to myself, to material things, to that which gives me a sense of identity, the less likely I am to be at peace with myself.
- I have learnt that to love another you have to first love yourself.
- I have learnt that drugs do not work – meditation is far more powerful.
- I have learnt that sex can have a spiritual dimension.
- I have learnt that it is possible to have a soulmate in this life, maybe more than one.
- I have learnt that only through silence can I hear that which tries to speak to me
- I have learnt to accept that I am fundamentally weak, as are all human beings.
- I have learnt that intellectual knowledge is not enough in itself. We have to be humble enough to say ‘I do not know and cannot know everything’.
- I have learnt that every religion is the same in that it offers a path to the spiritual world around us and within us, and a pathway to enlightenment and inner peace.
- I have learnt to live in peace with my desires and ego, but not to let them determine who I am or what I can become.
- I have learnt that there is more to this life than can possibly be known and that we should not try to know everything but to accept our lack of knowledge.
- I have learnt that whatever I have learnt is only thoughts and words in this life – I actually know very little. It doesn’t matter. I have enough knowledge to live my life in a better, more enlightened way.
- I have learnt to forgive myself when I fail to heed and follow what I have learnt.
